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The world according to Thea听Monye茅

By Elizabeth Exline

Thea Monye茅 is a poet, , a podcaster, a therapist and . She has performed in a variety of roles and venues, from Def Poetry to . She can deliver a dressing down as powerfully as she can a keynote speech. And while she defies categories as a rule, there鈥檚 one that manages to capture both her work and who she is as a person: storytelling. For Monye茅 sees connections in everything; indeed, she always has.

鈥淭he older you get or the further you get in your journey, you realize you were always who you were. You just went through different iterations of being,鈥 Monye茅 observes. 鈥淚 was that kid who felt everything was alive and greeted everything like it was alive. 鈥楬ello, cup! Hello, car! Hello, stuffed animal!鈥 I was very conscious of having a relationship with everything around me, and I didn鈥檛 know at the time that that was also a spirituality within me.鈥

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Speaking her truth

Monye茅 would come to know her spiritual side well, but she took a nonlinear path to get there. As a child, she did well in school and thought she鈥檇 be a novelist or a pediatrician.

But when she got to college, she floundered. The pressure of having to know what to do with her life, to be certain at 18, while simultaneously dealing with her parents鈥 deteriorating marriage proved too much.

Monye茅 stepped back. At the behest of friends, she went to Da Poetry Lounge, performed toward the end of an open-mic session, got a standing ovation and was hooked.

鈥淚 was there every week,鈥 Monye茅 recalls. 鈥淚 was writing ferociously, and that led to me doing Def Poetry, which, at that time [in the early 2000s], was like the biggest thing spoken word had.鈥

Poetry tapped into a love of writing Monye茅 had had since childhood. It allowed her to crystalize her emotions, experiences and viewpoints.

It also led to her working with children in juvenile detention. As an artist, she could teach writing to youth who had run into trouble with the law, and that allowed her to explore another passion she鈥檇 cultivated since she was a girl learning to keep the peace in her home: therapy.

鈥淭hat鈥檚 when I decided I knew what I wanted to do,鈥 Monye茅 says. 鈥淚 went back [to school] and got my BS in Human Services [now a Bachelor of Science in Social Work] at SM调教所, which I loved. I went right back and got my master鈥檚 in counseling. 鈥 I felt like a completely different student at that point in my life.鈥

'Decolonizing' and healing

At that point, Monye茅 was a completely different student. She was older. She was a mother. And she was opening up to an awareness that would inform her work as both a therapist and an artist.

That awareness centered on the same interconnectedness she鈥檇 tapped into as a child. Just as she鈥檇 felt a kinship to animate and inanimate objects alike, she began to explore unorthodox ways of helping people. She participated in in which patients are supported with social services and therapy as well as family and community resources.

鈥淚t was like you were never working on those cases alone,鈥 Monye茅 says. 鈥淵ou became a part of the family for a year or two.鈥

This experience, combined with an approach to therapy that Monye茅 playfully describes as gumbo 鈥 鈥渢hrow anything in the pot and see what works鈥 鈥 led Monye茅 to her current work in healing through 鈥渄ecolonization.鈥

Decolonization is a big claim and one that Monye茅 is careful to explain. 鈥淚 think people think race, but I really think in terms of culture and ethnicity, because many cultures have been colonized by other cultures.鈥

Just as the world is home to many plants and many animals, so too must it support many people, cultures and personalities in order to thrive.

鈥淭he idea that there should be one type of human or one way for humans to live is anti-creation,鈥 Monye茅 points out.

Her solution? Focus on finding individual freedom and joy within a culture that can sometimes be at odds with that. This is the essence of the decolonization work Monye茅 does with a cohort of educators, doctors and therapists.

As a therapeutic process, decolonization works to identify and 鈥渦nlearn鈥 the ideas and practices that restrict or oppress people.

Monye茅 works to give people language, awareness, intention and a new framework for understanding life and finding joy.

鈥淛oy is our metric, and that follows through everything we do,鈥 she says.

鈥淓verything,鈥 by the way, includes a lot. In addition to her therapy work, Monye茅 has called Blood & Bajareque that explores concepts of identity and love. She hosts a podcast called Shaping the Shift, and she facilitates counseling and diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) consultations under the umbrella of MarleyAyo, a portmanteau of the surname of legendary singer鈥搒ongwriter Bob Marley and ayo, a Yoruba word meaning joy. She even facilitates a 鈥渨hite-identified racial healing cohort鈥 known as FreeJoy Experience.

Joy, after all, is for everyone.

A spiritual awakening

The therapeutic framework for decolonization is functional but rooted in spirituality. Monye茅 was raised in the Christian faith, but one that also wove in traditions from Africa, the Caribbean and Central America. She recalls going to church in her family鈥檚 Cadillac every week as clearly and happily as she remembers little rituals that were distinctly outside the realm of traditional Christianity.

鈥淢y grandma, when she would comb our hair, she would take the hair and she would burn it up,鈥 Monye茅 says. 鈥淎nd that sounds a little witchy.鈥澨

This and other traditions laid the groundwork for a spiritual reckoning that arrived for Monye茅 around 2016.

鈥淚 was really grieving that I didn鈥檛 have a practice that connected me to my ancestors, that I didn鈥檛 have language anymore," she says. "I was feeling that part of my Black American experience where I was feeling the loss of my culture.鈥澨

Monye茅 eventually came into contact with a spiritual leader who introduced her to the traditions and practices native to Nigeria. 鈥淚t鈥檚 been the most expansive experience of my life,鈥 she observes.

In Nigeria, spirituality is integrated into daily life. Whereas 鈥渞eligion鈥 captures a certain category of belief and practice in the West, daily life in Africa integrates the spiritual.

鈥淗ow you live is your religion,鈥 Monye茅 explains.

Really, that's not so different in the West. What we prioritize is what we worship. It鈥檚 just that 鈥渞eligion鈥 or 鈥渟pirituality鈥 doesn鈥檛 usually make it into the top three.

For Monye茅, however, it鈥檚 a different story.听听

鈥淒ifferent divinities support [your] path,鈥 she explains. 鈥淭he different elements of nature support that path. Different ancestors had to put that path or blueprint to you and what you are here to bring into the world while you鈥檙e here. And so it鈥檚 all tied to your character and your destiny. The greater your character is, the more your destiny can come forward. And your destiny is here to serve a purpose in the world.鈥澨

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